


The Baby I Learned to Love

by wyomingparmesan



Category: The Loud House (Cartoon)
Genre: Family, Flashbacks, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Little Louds, POV First Person, aged down
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-01
Updated: 2018-10-01
Packaged: 2019-07-21 01:45:15
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,793
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16149944
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wyomingparmesan/pseuds/wyomingparmesan
Summary: Lynn tells the story of how she hated being a big sister, and how she saw her little brother as nothing but an attention stealer. The story of how she learned to love being a big sister, and that maybe, just maybe, Lincoln wasn't a pest after all.





	The Baby I Learned to Love

Growing up with ten siblings isn't easy. It takes a lot of patience, and perseverance. Each of my siblings has their own talents. My oldest sister is the captain of the the golf team, my second youngest has a PhD. What is mine you may ask? Why, I'm good at just about every sport you can think of. Football, soccer, baseball, you name it.

When I'm not practicing, which let's be real here, is practically never, I love hanging out with my siblings. I'm the fifth of eleven. I have nine sisters who I love so much. If there was anyone I love hanging out with more, it's my little brother, Lincoln.

We're only two years apart, so it only makes sense that we're pretty close. I've been trying to toughen him up for years, but it hasn't worked much. He's a big softie.

It hasn't always been this way, though. I can remember being really little, and I was so mean to him. I kind of wish I could take it back now, but my mom says not to worry about it so much, as I was little. Still, it's hard for me to believe I used to hate my own baby brother.

I can remember the day my parents brought him home. Something strange happened, I'm still not sure what, but my older sisters were so excited. My Pop Pop had just woken me from my nap, so I was kinda cranky. All I remember was my sisters going crazy, and me being well...a toddler _._

* * *

" _Can I see him? Oh can I? Can I?!"_

_My sisters jumped up and down, trying as hard as they could to get to the baby my mommy was holding. My daddy watched them, his face looking as calm as he could be. Their voices started to get louder, and he settled them down with his hands._

" _Girls, girls, shh," he said, holding a finger to his mouth. "Your mother is very tired, and so is the baby, please be calm, okay?"_

_My sisters stopped jumping, and held their hands over their mouths._

" _Sorry, Daddy," they said._

_He shook his head. "It's okay," he assured them. "Now, you'll all get to hold the baby, but first I want little Junior to see him."_

_I was still curled up in my Pop Pop's arms when my daddy looked over to me, holding his arms out. He put his face really close to mine, and started spewing softly. "Hey baby girl, did you see have a nice nap?"_

_I was still really tired, I wasn't supposed to wake up yet. I shook my head up and down. "I tired."_

_My daddy's face changed. "Aw, I'm sorry," he whispered, and grabbed me from my Pop Pop. I was soon laying across his shoulder, his hands rubbing my back. "I just want you to meet your baby brother, then you can go back to sleep, okay?"_

_I shook my head up and down, trying not to close my eyes._

_I loved being in my daddy's arms. He was so warm, and soft. His clothes smelled so good, I'm not sure what it was. He always knew how to make me stop crying when I had bad dreams, or when I got an ouchie._

_He was the best Daddy ever. I was his baby. I turned my head, and saw my mommy standing there. She was waving at me, so I held up my hand and waved back. She pointed to the blanket she was holding, it also had a baby in it._

_The baby who was here to take my place._

_My sisters said that the baby is a boy. I don't know how that makes him special. Boys aren't that different from girls, right?_

_My daddy sat me down on the couch. It was so soft, I was ready to fall asleep. I saw all of my family walking to me. My sisters were all smiling, I don't know why._

" _Alright, Lynn, hold out your arms," my mommy said._

_I did, and then there it was. They laid the baby across me._

" _Hold his head," my daddy said, as he moved my hand under his neck._

" _Look, Junior, this is Lincoln," he told me. "Your baby brother."_

_I looked at the baby laying on me. He was wrapped in a blue blanky, it had some kind of bird on it. His hair was white, it kinda scared me. I think he was trying to sleep cuz his eyes kept opening and closing._

_I looked up to see my whole family standing around me, watching. I wasn't sure what they wanted me to do._

_I went back to looking at my brother. I had decided I didn't like him much. He didn't do anything, just laid there. His cheeks were pink, they were weird looking._

_I took my fingers and put them on his cheek, pinching it as hard as I could. His eyes opened, and his face looked funny. Then I had to cover my ears because he cried so loud that it hurt._

" _Make him stop, Daddy!", I yelled over his crying._

_He grabbed Lincoln away from me, holding him close to his chest. "Shh, it's okay," he rocked him._

" _Way to go, Lynn, you made our new brother cry," my biggest sister, Lori said, putting her hands on her hips._

_My other sisters started yelling at me, and I could feel the tears in my eyes. I whimpered as they started coming down my face._

" _Girls, leave Lynn alone," my mommy said. "She's only two, she doesn't know any better."_

" _But she was mean to Lincoln!", Leni said._

" _She's never been around a baby that small before," said my mommy. "Give her time, she'll warm up to him."_

_I pouted even more. I didn't like that baby, and I never will._

* * *

I laughed as I remembered that moment. I admit, I'm still hard on Lincoln sometimes, but I'd never be mean to him on purpose. When he was born though, I thought of him as an enemy. Like he was here to take my place. So, I made it my mission to get as much attention from my parents as possible, even if it meant being mean to the baby.

* * *

_I sat around the table in the living room with my big sissies. We were watching cartoons and playing. Blarney the Dinosaur was on, it was our favorite._

_Leni was next to me, she was coloring in her coloring book. Sometimes I'd take her crayons and stick them up my nose. I think it's funny. I'm the couch were Lori and Luan. They were talking about something I didn't understand. Luna was on the other side of the room, playing with her piano thingy. I don't know what it's called._

_The house was always noisy, but today it was extra noisy. Next to the things happening in the living room: the TV, Luan telling Lori stuff that wasn't funny, and Luna playing music, the sound of Lincoln's screaming could be heard from upstairs._

_I covered my ears. "Make it stop!", I yelled. That dumb baby was interrupting my show._

" _I know, sweetie, I'm trying."_

_Just then, the crying got much more loud, and I saw my daddy standing at the bottom of the stairs. He had Lincoln on his shoulder, and he wasn't happy. He looked really tired. I think he needed a nap._

" _Your mother has been so exhausted, so I'm letting her take a nap while I care for this one," he said, patting the baby's back._

" _What's wrong with him, Daddy?", Lori asked._

_He shook his head. "I'm not sure, honey," he said. "He's been crying for almost an hour. Your mom fed him before she laid down, I just changed his diaper, nothing has helped."_

_I watched as he walked over to us. "I think I'll try his swing, that always works." He put Lincoln in his swing, and pushed the button._

_My eyes followed it as it swung from side to side. I had to turn away because I looked too long, and it almost made me sick._

_My daddy stood up, and wiped his head. Lincoln was still crying, but it wasn't as noisy. Finally, I could watch my show._

" _There we go," he said. "Now, do you girls want some lunch?"_

_My sisters said yes, like they were excited. I smiled really big, and ran up to hug his leg. "Yes, pwease I so hungry," I said._

_I felt him rub my hair. "Aw, I guess that's a "yes", huh?", he said. "And you're getting so good at your words, Junior! Just like we practiced."_

_I went back to my spot on the floor, smiling really big. I was so proud of myself. Every day, Mommy and Daddy would teach me new words, it was so much fun. We haven't done it since my dumb brother was born, though. Another reason why I did not like him._

_My daddy went into the dining room, but turned around. "Oh, one more thing," he started. "Lori, will you give Lincoln his pacifier?"_

_I looked at my sister, who jumped off the couch. "Sure thing, Daddy," she said as she grabbed his paci from the table._

_It was no fair. I had a paci too, I loved it so much. Then, one day, I woke up and it was gone. I cried for a whole day about it. Mommy told me that I was too old for it, and that I needed to act like a big girl. I didn't want to be a big girl._

_My biggest sister sat down in front of the swing, and stuck the paci in Lincoln's mouth. He took it, and finally, his crying stopped. My ears felt so happy._

_I thought Lori would get up, but she just sat there. Her head moved along with the swing. I hoped she didn't get sick._

_She pushed a button on the swing, and it stopped. I thought it would make Lincoln cry, but it didn't._

_I didn't know what was going on, so I crawled closer. They were looking at each other, Lori was smiling, but Lincoln just looked tired._

_She stuck out her hand, and rubbed his hair. "He has so much hair," she said. I watched as she took her other hand and made his hair stick up._

_She started to play with him. Taking his hands, she made him clap as she sang a song. When she tried to let go, he grabbed her finger._

" _Wow, you're a strong baby," she said. She moved her other hand down to his feet. His foot twitched as she tickled it, and he let out a giggle._

_She had a smile on her face now, then she saw me. "Come here, Lynny," she waved her hand at me._

_I sat on my knees and crossed my arms. "No," I said._

_She sighed and looked down. "Don't you wanna make Lincoln happy?"_

_I poured. Why did I care if he was happy? He was a dumb baby._

_I shook my head. "No."_

_Before I knew what was happening, Lori picked me up by my armpits._

" _No no no!", I yelled, trying to get free from her arms._

_She sat me down in front of Lincoln, and I almost fell over. I think it scared him because he dropped his binky from his mouth. I watched as his face changed, and he started to whine._

" _Uh oh," Leni said from the table. "Linky is gonna cry."_

_I covered my ears. Not this again, please!_

" _Here, Lynn," Lori said. She picked up his binky and gave it to me. "Give him this."_

_I held the paci in my hand. Oh, how I missed mine. It made me feel so safe, and helped me sleep. Then it was taken away from me. I was still sad._

_I felt my mouth turn into a frown. I looked from my hand to Lincoln, who was still sad._

_Before I knew it, my hand was moving towards my mouth. The nipple of the paci touching it. I wanted it so bad._

_Then, the sounds of his cries met my ears. His soft cries asking for attention, and love._

_With sad eyes, I put my hand down. I used both my hands to hold his binky. I had to do something that I didn't really want to._

_I turned so I was facing him. His face was red, and he pulled at it with his hands._

_I leaned towards him, and put the binky in his mouth. His crying stopped as he sucked on it. He moved his hands away from his face, and grabbed onto one of mine._

_I could see Lori looking at me, a smile on her face. I didn't smile. I wasn't sure how to feel._

_Lincoln looked at me, his face was calm and soft. His cheeks weren't red, but pink. He kicked his legs, and made little sounds._

_I could feel his hand pulling on mine. It was so soft, he was so small. A little smile showed up on his face._

_I began to feel different. My belly felt weird, like I might get sick._

_Lori came closer to me. "Look Lynn," she said quietly. "He likes it when you tickle him."_

_She grabbed my other hand, and put it on his belly. His jammies were so soft, and I liked how I could feel him breathing._

_I took my fingers, and tickled him a little. His feet jumped, and I moved back._

" _What is it, Lynny?", Lori asked me._

" _I hurt him," I said._

" _No, no he's okay," she touched his head. "See?"_

_I looked at her. "He okay?"_

_She shook her head up and down._

_I looked back to my brother. He was still looking at me. I put my hand back on his belly, and started tickling him again._

_He started laughing. He did so much that he lost his binky again. I got scared because I thought he would cry again._

_He didn't though, and I was happy._

_Hearing his little laugh made my ears happy. I laughed too._

_For a bit, it was just me and the baby. We were having fun. I turned on his swing again, and watched as he started to sleep._

_From the side of my eye, I saw my daddy smiling at me._

_I still wasn't sure, but maybe, just maybe he wasn't such a bad baby after all._

* * *

I still love Lincoln's laugh. There was something so wonderful about it. His face would turn red, he'd hold his stomach so he wouldn't fall over, sometimes he'd cry too.

He's still ticklish on his stomach and feet, too. I like to take advantage of that sometimes, heh. I like to get him when he's least expecting it, like when he's watching television, or reading his comics. He's always half naked when he does that, so it makes it way easier.

I remember that after that day, I had a strange feeling in my heart. I was too young to understand what it meant, but all I knew was that I didn't want my baby brother to cry anymore.

I did my best to stop that from happening.

* * *

_Sometimes, I liked to wake up before my sisters. That way, I could have the TV first._

_The only bad part though was that my brother would wake up too._

_I liked to sit down on the couch as I watch my show. My mommy would sit next to me too. Sometimes, she'd let me sit in her lap._

_I remember when it was hard for me to sit there because her belly was too big. She told me it was the baby, but I didn't see one._

_Well, now there was a baby in her lap. She watched my show with me as she gave Lincoln a bottle._

_He was so small, but he ate so much. She gave me a cup of milk too. That made me happy._

_Sometimes I looked over at them. She would talk to him while he ate, and she would rub his hair._

_I pouted, and scooted over. I laid against her, laying my head in her side._

_She looked over to me. "Aww, hi sweetie," she said. "Do you want love too?"_

_I shook my head up and down._

" _Well, I have to have both of my hands to feed your brother," she said._

_I took my sippy from my mouth and pouted._

_She sighed. "I'm sorry, sweetie."_

_I felt like I was gonna cry. There goes that dumb baby taking my stuff again._

_She looked at him, then at me._

" _Here, I have an idea," she said, taking the bottle from Lincoln's mouth._

_As he began to whine, she grabbed my sippy from me. I reached out for it, and she grabbed my hand._

" _Here," she handed me the bottle. "Give it to your brother."_

_I looked down at Lincoln, who was still whining. She moved my hand down to him, and he took the nipple in his mouth._

_I held it there as his crying stopped, and he started drinking it._

_Mommy smiled at us, and I felt her put her arm around me. She pushed me closer to her side, just like I wanted._

_I looked at Lincoln. His eyes looking back at me as I held his bottle, making sure he didn't choke._

_It made me smile, the way he looked at me._

_When he was done, I took his bottle away. Our mommy picked him up, and put him on her shoulder. She started patting him, and I heard a little burp._

" _Such a good boy," she said as she put him back in her lap. A little bit of white stuff came out of his mouth._

_I gasped. "Uh oh," I said. "He sick."_

_Mommy laughed, and picked up a tissue from the table. "Oh no, he's alright, sweetie," she said. "Babies just do that sometimes." She wiped his mouth._

_I smiled. "Oh, he okay," I said, rubbing his hair. I hadn't really touched it much. It was so soft, like my favorite stuffed animal._

_He stuffed his hand in his mouth. He sucked on it, like he knew something was missing._

" _Oh!", I said. I got up from the couch, and went to the table. There it was, his paci. The thing that made him love me when he was sad in his swing._

_I went back to the couch, and climbed up. "Yook, Linky," I said. His eyes changed when I showed it to him. I leaned to him, and placed it in his mouth._

_He kicked his feet, and giggled._

_Our mommy smiled at me. "You know what he wanted didn't you, Junior?", she said to me._

_I shook my head up and down. "He like his paci," I said. "It make him happy."_

_She kissed my hair. "Yes, it really does," she said. "And you know what else makes Lincoln happy?"_

_I looked at her._

_She put a finger on my shirt. "You do."_

_I felt happy, it was weird. I still didn't like Lincoln much because he took my mommy and daddy away from me. They always looked happy when they were with him though, and me too. I think they really wanted me to love him, and maybe I did. I didn't know._

_My mommy and daddy weren't just mine. They were his too._

_I did something I thought I'd never do._

_I leaned to my baby brother, and kissed his head. His face looked so happy, and his noises sounded like it._

_I know it made our mommy happy too because she had water on her face. That meant she was happy._

_He was a good baby, and maybe I did love him._

* * *

Now that I think about it, Lincoln really was such a cute baby. He had this little spot of white hair that was just long enough for us to play with it. I remember at one point, Leni gave him little pigtails.

I know that I did start to realize that he really wasn't so bad after all. Though, that did change at one point.

When he was about six months old, our parents moved him into my room. I didn't like that at all.

It was one thing dealing with him during the whole day, but it was then that I would have to hear him in the morning when he cried for food, or for his diaper to be changed.

I did learn to love it though, and I do miss it sometimes.

There's one night we shared that I'll never forget about.

* * *

_Mmm, my bed was so comfy. I had lots and lots of pillows, they were so soft. I opened my eyes and stretched. I looked over next to me._

_There he was, my brother, sleeping in his crib next to my bed. I hated to say it, but he was actually really cute. His hair got messed up from his sleep, and he made faces too._

_They were happy faces, like he was having a good dream._

_Tonight was different though. I watched Lincoln like I usually did, and he was making faces. Bad faces, like he was scared._

_He made noises that made my ears hurt. I liked listening to him usually. He would make cute sounds. Now, he just sounded sad._

_I decided that I needed to get up, so I took my cover off and sat up. I looked at the window next to me. It was still dark outside, and the only lights I could see were my nightlights._

_I stood up on the floor. The carpet was so soft under my feet. I adjusted my jammies because they were falling down. It was hard to walk when that happens._

_I got closer to him, and I put my hands on the bars of his crib. I stuck my head through them a little, just so I was close to his face._

_His face still looked sad, and I was scared that he might wake up. Poor little baby. I know my mommy and daddy told me not to ever bother him when he slept, but this time I wanted to._

_I wanted to save him from his bad dreams._

_I stuck my hand in his crib, and touched his face. He moved a little and turned away._

_I touched his belly this time, and he tried to move away._

" _Linky," I said quietly. "Linky, you okay?"_

_He started to move, and I saw his eyes open a little. Instead of looking at me though, he started to cry._

_I jumped back, and put my head down. I didn't wanna make him cry…that hurt me._

_I knew I had to make him feel better. I needed to do something that I know would get me in trouble._

_I walked over to my closet, and grabbed my step stool. I liked to use it to reach the sink when I brushed my teethies._

_I put it down next to the crib, and stepped on it. I put my hands up on the top, and used my feet to climb._

_I sat on the top of the bar. I knew I had to be careful because Lincoln was so small. I didn't want to hurt him._

_There was a pillow next to me, so I let myself fall onto it. It made him jump a little, but he was safe. Thank goodness._

_I laid there for a bit, trying to make sure my legs still worked. I rolled over to my belly, and used my arms to crawl to my brother._

_His cries made my ears hurt, but I knew that he needed my help._

_I laid next to him. I frowned when I saw how sad he was._

" _Linky," I said, not too loud because I know it would scare him._

_He kicked his feet, and scratched his face with his little hands. I knew my parents could come up here, but I didn't care._

_I moved closer to him, and put my face next to his head._

" _Linky, it me," I said._

_This time, he turned to look at me. He was still crying, but he stopped to look at me. His face was still so soft, and it was covered in tears._

_I reached out my hand and rubbed his hair. "It okay, Linky," I said. "I here."_

_His crying became softer as I rubbed his head. His mouth was in the shape of a frown, and it made me sad._

_I wrapped my arm around him, pulling him closer to me. I put my face against his, and kissed his nose._

" _I know you sad, Linky," I said. "But I your big sissy, and I make it better, okay?"_

_I smiled. Wait, did I just say I'm his big sister? Yeah, I guess I did._

_His crying stopped, but he was still whining._

_I pulled him closer to me, my arm wrapped around him._

_I gave him another kiss, this time on his cheek. "It okay, Linky," I said. "I wuv you."_

_He put his hand on my face, and squeezed my nose. I could see a small smile on his little face._

_We laid there, playing with each other's hair until we fell asleep. That was a night I would never forget._

_The night I realized that I loved my baby brother._

* * *

I felt my eyes begin to water as I remembered that time. We were so small, so innocent. It was that moment when I realized my purpose as a big sister, and that I had a baby brother who loved me even when I didn't give him a chance.

This whole time, I've been laying here on my bed, throwing a tennis ball at the wall. It was something I used to help me think, to calm me down.

When I remembered that night though, I stopped. I held the ball in my hands, close to my chest. My breathing became shallow as I felt myself begin to cry.

Remembering the times when I didn't love Lincoln really took a lot of out of me. It was something I didn't like to think about. I feel that it's important to tell that story though because it reminds me of how far we've come.

I sat the ball next to me, and used my hands to wipe my eyes. Lucy wasn't in the room with me, thankfully. I didn't like anyone seeing me cry, even her. Though, I know she understands that.

I waited for my breathing to calm down, and for my heart to slow down in my chest.

I took that time to reflect on everything. I remembered I had something I needed to do.

I got up from my bed, and went out into the hallway. I looked at the room to the far left of me. The door was open and the light was off.

I walked straight ahead and down the stairs into the living room. I found my target.

I slipped to the other side of the couch, standing behind it so that he couldn't see me.

I observed him for a moment. He sat there on the couch, watching his favorite show. He looked pretty bored, but every now and then he'd laugh.

That made me smile.

I ducked behind the couch, and slipped into the seat at the end. I scooted closer, until I was right next to him. I knew he wouldn't be expecting it.

I threw my arms around his neck, pushing our heads together. I heard him gasp.

"Aaa! Lynn!", Lincoln said. "What are you doing?"

I squeezed him harder. "What? A big sister can't hug her little brother?"

I felt the air escape his chest as he sighed. "You can, this just isn't like you," he said. "You never give me random hugs."

"Well, I had something I needed to tell you," I told him, leaning in closer.

He raised a brow. "What is it?"

I pulled him towards me, and gave him a kiss on the cheek. "I love you."

His face lit up, and I felt him hug me back. "I love you, too."

Lincoln was one of a kind. He was smart, and sweet, and bit of a wimp. He loved superheroes, and fried mac and cheese.

His interests may change one day, but one thing was for certain. We had a love for each other that would never change.

And, most importantly:

He would always be my baby brother, and I'd always be his big sister.

Always.


End file.
